Yesterday morning I woke up to a message from a dear friend asking if I'd be willing to get in contact with her friend who just discovered he has appendix cancer. I told her I would do my best to get in contact and answer any questions he and his wife had if I was able to.
Later in the day I noticed my pink boxing gloves in my china cabinet. Remember those? The boxing gloves my husband gave me to encourage me to fight this horrible disease. The encouraging words and verses that are written on them from friends and family who walked alongside us. I remember when I was wasting away and had little fight left in me. My husband put the gloves on my hand and took a picture. He sent it in a mass email to our support network asking them to pray for me because I didn't have much strength left to fight. I felt like I was in despair and I needed the army of prayer warriors to pound the doors of heaven on my behalf.
As I looked at these gloves I took note that on the 19th of January it will have been 3 years since my surgery to remove my appendix because they thought I had appendicitis. And on the 25th is will have been 3 yrs since I heard the CANCER word for the first time. I realized that in that moment, while looking at my gloves, that in some ways it feels like forever since that all happened or that in some ways it didn't really happen at all. It was such a long, horrifically painful and scary journey. Then I am reminded of the limitations of my body that I still deal with daily. I am reminded of the port still in me that it used for the TPN I still get 3 nights a week. I am reminded of how horrible it all was but also how far I have come and how far I still have to go.
I was able to talk with this couple that I mentioned about above. With a new diagnosis the fear of the unknown is real. I totally understand. Needing to get second opinions and discover if he is a candidate for the HIPEC surgery/chemo that I had had. They wanted to hear my story and get some encouragement. I shared about the gloves. I shared how I filled my head and heart with verses, worship songs, and Christian podcasts in the months I was in the hospital. I shared how I clung to Jesus and how even though I fought a rare and aggressive cancer (which he is not fighting) that our God is RARE and AGGRESSIVE too. I was able to pray for them. I don't believe God purposely puts us through such heartache but I do believe that he REDEEMS these difficulties and that there are many opportunities for us to walk alongside others who face similar difficulties as we had. If you are reading this please pray for Aaron as he has a long road ahead of him.
Tonight I gathered with some women from our LOCAL life group through YACC (Young Adults Cancer Canada). This group is for people ages 18 to 39. It was neat to be in a room with a number of people who have either fought or are fighting the battle with various forms of cancer. We can go from sharing about our cancer journeys to laughing and playing games and talking about normal life. I am thankful for this new group of people I am slowly getting to know.
In May, here in our city, we are having the YACC SURVIVOR'S Conference. https://youngadultcancer.ca/program/survivor-conference/ To learn more about the survivor conference you can click on the link to read more about it. It will be a few day conference where we will have sessions and activities. I believe this will be a great place for my husband to connect with others who are supporters to loved ones facing cancer. I have had a lot of support over the last 3 yrs and have found many others who I can relate with and talk with about cancer and how it has affected my life but he hasn't necessarily to that same extent. So I am thankful he's able to join me at this conference. I am thankful to my family who will care for my kids. I look forward to the sessions and hopefully I will find some ways to help manage the stress and anxiety that I have experienced post cancer diagnosis. Hopefully sharing my story in a room with many others as well as listening to their stories will bring healing and encouragement as well.
There will be people from across Canada coming to this conference and I hear the wait list to get in is LONG. We are doing a number of fundraisers as Team Manitoba to help raise funds for those of us living in MB to be able to help reduce the cost to attend the conference. If you are looking for something to donate to this is a great cause! https://youngadultcancer.akaraisin.com/pledge/Team/Home.aspx?seid=21166&mid=10&tid=276627 Just click on this link and it will take you to our TEAM Manitoba home page where you can donate.
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